In Rumis name

I belong not to this world, not to that
I struggle and stumble
I seek and yet I do not find
I now forget what I seek…
I tempt myself with what I see
I do not search and I do not sense
I now forget what I seek…

Promises:III

I will

Thousands of miles as a crow flies
Millions of years as time glides by
I will wait
And if I must,I will come your way
I will not forsake you
I will not promise and keep you waiting
I say this not to make you happy
I say this for myself
I say it to show you a mirror
I say it to prove why you can never be me
I am impassive
I am solemn
I am silent
I am a bird in a cage
I do not belong to the skies
I do not live by nature
I live by myself
Yet in all indulgences, I do not know the magic you do
I declare I do not need them
I am not built to bask in another’s sorrow
Deep inside you must know what you do
If it is wrong, right or just
Why I perish and you do not?

Promises:II

By the setting sun

By the witness of this setting sun and solemn water
I take your hand not in obvious lust
Not to last until the sun sets between those faraway trees
Not until my body or yours reigns this earthly retreat
Beyond the expanding waters before us, that one day reaches the sea
Beyond the skies that holds the divine spark of this sunset
I hold your hand with my body and soul
I do not fear and I do not worry
As I now promise, you must know I will live by it
I will not deceive and I will not forget

Promises:I

Boat to heaven

There’s a place called heaven
There’s a man who will take you their
Sometimes for the favor, he will seize your soul
But sometimes he will take you for free

In a nut shell

This day
That day
Which day?
My day
Our day
A dogs day
I wonder
I fantasize
I cherish
I relish
I fathom
I believe
I lose
I gain
I speak
I signal
I save
I wonder
I fathom
I walk away

The word ‘depressed’

Then she told me

I am depressed.
I am very depressed.
And all I can do is close my eyes.

That summer

Something happened that summer
The rains didn’t come nor did the birds
Slowly I lost it, slowly I crumbled
Details vanished so did the rhythm
What little I had I lost it to the storm

Letters were forgotten, faces erased
One fine day I woke up and saw not myself
A phantom in disguise
I thought of the convictions I had
Searched them in the drawers
My notebooks, my sharpened pencils
In the line of books I proudly possessed

They were all gone
I cried in agony, cursed myself
I stopped asking, I stopped praying

But silently time healed my wounds
In between pages I found happiness again
Now I walk through a ladybird path
They die crushed under by feet
I walk away shuddering to a point on the horizon

What brings me here?
She calls it a twist of fate
Sighing she says
Who knows how much suffering is written in your part?

places

We loved that part of town
In our young days when the place was prospering
We walked joyously through its streets
Dark alleys and hot sunlight mattered none
We soaked every bit of light, laughed with the damp air

Years later we passed through the same parts
A place to pass by, not to pause
We sniffed at the dirt from our cozy seats
The tumbling houses, wretched children

But some days, we wondered if someone traced our footprints in that forlorn place
If we could feel such joy once again
Heat, dust and dirt we did not see
Only fogs of happiness encircling us
Ah! So ignorant but free.

There are many places I spent my days. When I must remember them, I do not remember their structures but what memories I created occupying a part of them…….

Hope…

I hope we can weep over our broken dreams
Our unfulfilled desires, wistful thoughts
What stopped us from taking one little step
A thousand regrets, not compliments

It will matter not
We will have each others company
Love wasn’t lost and God dead
Or else How could I have found you and you found me?

( P.S: Pic by Dikshya @ The Floriculture Trade Fair 2008 )

The last call….

The night slumbers on
I wait in silent passing
A story echoes in my ears
Tale of a woman compromising
She’s reading a poem ‘Grass’
Voices not so melodic yet my night mate
Before the story ends my eyes welcome darkness
Voices stop, headphones unplugged unconsciously

Little red lights, smell of mosquito mats and small dark shadows
My night call: it says 1:33 am
Two days in a row, exact time
Walking that way, may be no more
Missing a little walk but there’s another path
Harsh sun rays, alien smells….way back home
Wasted fear, droning journey
Silent outbursts…why?
Feel good one liner
Long summer days, incoherent habits
Not even music or put way favorite books
Lost appetite not to be revived
Summer of their lives: blurb says
It sticks to my head
I welcome another season
I search for my reason
A little hope and one long night………….